I had dinner with my girlfriend and she was asking how I guard against other women that appear in Bestion’s life.
My reply – “Nothing. I mean, what can you do?”.
You can’t control men. Neither can men control women. It’s a free market. Temptations are everywhere and EVERYONE will be facing them.
Yes, you can check his smses, emails and even his whereabouts. BUT the fact is that if he intends to hide, there’s no way you can know. The more you try to control, the smarter he gets in hiding stuff. Also, if you have to constantly worry if he has his dick in someone else’s vagina, probably the man isn’t worth keeping, or probably, you should head to the psychiatrist for follow-ups.
So what can you do?
I’m not sure too.
A man isn’t a dog – it’s impossible to keep them faithfully by your side. They have to be the ones willing to be true to you.
Of course, you can always be the perfect girlfriend that he hopes to have (read: have a pretty face and sexy figure, have brains to hold intellectual conversations, possess the ability to cook and do housechores, and most importantly, give blowjobs every morning when he wakes and before he sleeps, and probably owns the ability to keep growing vaginas so that he can never get sick of fucking one hole). But still, we know that no matter how perfect a girlfriend is, boyfriends will still stray because their dicks get itchy and the vagina is always more fuckable on the other bodies. And for that, we are talking about billions of ladies who simply appear different from you.
Or you can be like me – just give him the freedom. As cliche as it sounds, you love the guy for who he is. If he is a flirt, he IS a flirt. If you aren’t ok with it, probably you should leave him instead of asking him to change. Think about it – there’s a reason why men can’t fake orgasms as well as women do. Because they utilize their energy to fake something else – that they can change for you. (If you need any rules, there is a golden one who goes like this: if men can change, they are faking it.)
I used to crave for a pure relationship. I had zero tolerance for infidelity because I thought love is all about being true to each other. And being true, I framed it by “the one and only”. If I could, I would write my name on his dick with a permanent marker to signify my possession. As I dated an assortment of jerks and went through my fair share of breakups, I realise, love is still about being true to each other. But this time round, by being true, I found out that it meant being who you really are in front of the person, as well as really accepting him for who he is, including his tendency for infidelity.
When he strays, ask him why. Of course it would hurt, but before you get all emotional and tears start rolling, it’s better to first understand the thought process that he had before you decide if there’s a need to issue the death penalty. I may be crazy to have such a mindset, but I figured that when infidelity happens, “it’s just sex” is definitely a legitimate reason as compared to “i’m not sure who I love now”. The only reason that can make me give up a guy is the non-existence of love. Other than that, I possess the ability to rationalize his doings as part of gaining his experiences in life. Temptation, after all, is a very big draw… and sadly, it’s human nature to wish they have been the lucky ones. The only consolation you get is that men do not fall in love very easily because love commitments are their greatest fear, and so you can be quite assured that they do love you. It’s just sex and their dicks (literally) acting up… again.
It also helps if you are a little more open-minded…. because the more open-minded you are, the higher your jealousy threshold will be, and then the less of your wrath he will incur.
How else to fend?
Ideally, I would say, kill all other women in the world and then pray that he doesn’t turn gay.
Or realistically, you can work out more. Train yourself up so that when the bad happens, your heart won’t hurt that much afterall.
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i’d say: wouldnt it be nice if u can keep yr man on a leash? everyday would be a tasty treat…
No promises, no demands.. the bedroom is a battlefield.
Forget about your bf and meet me at the hotel room.
meet you in hotel room? don’t think u are THAT good so not worth considering at all. :p
a man on a leash? – that’s NOT a man after all.
U’ll never know.. u’ll never know…
that kinky stuff, you nasty, but I like your type..
in the v 1st place… There isnt true love as what we human claim.. Human are good in coming out something out of no where and best part of it? U cant even explained wih clear definition via whatever lang we know.. Everything is virtual and we choose to make ourselve believe in this fairy tale world… Welcome to earth
so cynical. lol.. but well, it’s a game that we all love playing, at some point or another.
lol… That’s y i always say… “Welcome to the ugly truth” :p
hello, after reading this post of yours, i feel a bit enlightened!
cos i just found out my bf of 3yrs+ did sth unfaithful, and i nearly broke down, but your entry has definitely taught me a thing or two. you’re right, we can be perfect but they will still go fuck some others. maybe it is really better to let them do as they wish rather than keep restricting them or tracking them since the more we find out, the more hurt we feel ourselves. just want to thank you for this enlightening entry, although i still could not quite come to terms with his actions, but i guess i will get used to it, i mean, at least till now i still feel that he loves me, but just itchy for other girls.
oh dear, it must have been tough on you, elsie. sigh, what can I say? if i have the ability to preach one advice to lovers in the whole world, i’ll hope that before they do anything silly, they’ll remind themselves that loving someone to NOT to hurt the person.
Be strong, babe.
and thanks for your comment. it’s always a joy reading comments like this because my thoughts in rship matters go mostly un-noticed, since most readers are here for the sexual content.